Oh what joy in fellowship.
I believe that relationship is more the glue of this world. Just as there is this strong force that hold even the proton and neutron together, their is an incredibly, understated force that holds us together. I am not saying that we are going to fall apart, literally. I am saying that we will not be together, healthy, well.
These protons and neutrons that make up all of life are held together by what science calls nuclear binding energy. I think that this energy can be a real hint into a well rounded, Christ-like life. It needs to be bonded with an energy source. Just like our bodies need the whole of all parts working together to function properly, we as the followers of Christ needs that same functioning. And just like our atoms that we are made up of, there is a force that has to be a constant connecting power between us. The Holy Bonding Energy. Aka: Holy Spirit.
I must share too. When one submits itself and allows this undeniable power to come and take over life living, it is unstoppable the effect that it will have on a people group.
I taste this. It is good. I know the wholeness that can come after a true meeting with one another. I know that it is a deep desire we all have to be in a place and know that you belong there. That you were chosen as one of the people meeting in that place.
This is the grace. These longings unfulfilled can be washed and dyed into a cloth of beautiful usefulness. To a tapestry of color with purpose. We have to make the first baby step to the connecting place. We have to enter into the atom where the protons and neurons are connecting and plug into the nucleolus using that great Holy Bonding Energy as our shelter and our guide. We can stand behind a shield of faith knowing that God is not going to lead us to a place of failure. Our most Gracious Heavenly Father does not want us alone. He has designed us for relationships. It is our energy source. He has provided a family for us. And He is the Loving Father actively watching over us all. Working Himself moment by moment into the weave of who we are
Oh how sweet it is when sisters and brothers gather together in unity! Psalm 133:1
For this I am Thankful
Friday, December 2, 2011
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
The Point
Philippians 2 :1-11
So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus,who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.
Monday, November 28, 2011
Polyandrium
The realness of our Savior and the nearness of His Spirit brings humble heaviness on my head and heart, crushing cheekbones to the carpet of this deceiving world. I feel the sting of a friend's slow, painful, cancer filled death. I see another.
No care for the sacrificed paid on his behalf. Knowing full well the price Christ paid for his very life and trading it in for every quick fill that leaves emptiness in it's wake. With a glad heart I rejoice in the vision of my free friend dancing before our Father. The Greatest Lover. I imagine the tears gone and youth restored. She followed the Savior and gave what she had.
With unbearable anguish I cry over my other's stench pond of choices that leaves him floating down a river with a waterfall of reaping that will leave him dead as well. With an angry heart full of frstration at the weaknes of will I will imagine the Father not recognizing Him and I will cry even in heaven for his fate. Unforgiveness, abuse, idolitry, immoralities, the list goes on....was it worth it? Did it give you even a morsel of what it took? It's hurts to imagine.
Please Father make him obey you! But the Father draws us he does not hold us up and demmand we choose Him. He answers the knock, He does not come univited. So I return. Cheek to the carpet. Begging for mercy for the ones I love.
We are choosing to acknowledge Christ as all, but denying the reality of neither giving or submitting to Christ as the keeper of our days. Does this world not see the love? Why do we allow flesh and empty passions rule? What do they offer us that is so good, when the next day we are back to the drawing board. Was a night out that great? Was that new thing you tried that rewarding? Christ allowed himself to be mocked by the Romans soldiers. (Mark 15:16-20) We still mock Him today! It is not enough to acknowledge. He gave all and demands all! Is it not in His right to decide?
Mark 15:16-20 "Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life. And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith."
"I see the mountain so high and jagged.it seems impassible and an unrelenting journey" my lost friend cries silently in their darkness of heart."If God just knew what was in me, what I have done, what others have done to me, what I have put myself, and the people I love through." Let us remember the grace filled communion. Break the bread, His body broken for me and for you. God is not mocked. Drink the wine His blood spilled out. The great sacrifice ending the great battle being played out in this world. It is finished. It has been won. The Victory is the Lord's. You will be a slave to one or the other. And unlike most slaves you get the ultimate choice who you serve. Life or death. It will be one or the other. We must not blame evil any longer, we must not blame God. We must choose to see. He has Grace. He knew, He knows. He loves.
I plead face down in the carpet of my heart, with fists clenched, for the life of my friend, "Turn to the One who will never turn away from you! 'Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of earth will grow strangely dim. In the light of His glorious face.'"
Revelation 3:19-20 Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent. Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me.
God does not do selection like this world. He does not choose best dressed and coziest home. He does not want the next best talent.
He is looking for open hearts, and honest repenting. He is looking to take the dusty, misunderstood remains of our lives. He brings his sacrifice and love for us as a fertilizer to our ashy soil. Then it happens. A garden of his love, joy, and everything good is harvested in the springtime of our days shared with Him.
Friend, I beg you to choose Him. If you are thinking that this is too good. You are right. God is real and He is good. I know this in my bones. Reality showed itself to me the day I heard the knock and opened the door of my heart. The Father's reality became mine and now I am never alone. Still imperfect yes. But there are blossoms of color and goodness in the garden of my heart where there once was only weeds. And I am thankful.
No care for the sacrificed paid on his behalf. Knowing full well the price Christ paid for his very life and trading it in for every quick fill that leaves emptiness in it's wake. With a glad heart I rejoice in the vision of my free friend dancing before our Father. The Greatest Lover. I imagine the tears gone and youth restored. She followed the Savior and gave what she had.
With unbearable anguish I cry over my other's stench pond of choices that leaves him floating down a river with a waterfall of reaping that will leave him dead as well. With an angry heart full of frstration at the weaknes of will I will imagine the Father not recognizing Him and I will cry even in heaven for his fate. Unforgiveness, abuse, idolitry, immoralities, the list goes on....was it worth it? Did it give you even a morsel of what it took? It's hurts to imagine.
Please Father make him obey you! But the Father draws us he does not hold us up and demmand we choose Him. He answers the knock, He does not come univited. So I return. Cheek to the carpet. Begging for mercy for the ones I love.
We are choosing to acknowledge Christ as all, but denying the reality of neither giving or submitting to Christ as the keeper of our days. Does this world not see the love? Why do we allow flesh and empty passions rule? What do they offer us that is so good, when the next day we are back to the drawing board. Was a night out that great? Was that new thing you tried that rewarding? Christ allowed himself to be mocked by the Romans soldiers. (Mark 15:16-20) We still mock Him today! It is not enough to acknowledge. He gave all and demands all! Is it not in His right to decide?
Mark 15:16-20 "Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life. And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith."
"I see the mountain so high and jagged.it seems impassible and an unrelenting journey" my lost friend cries silently in their darkness of heart."If God just knew what was in me, what I have done, what others have done to me, what I have put myself, and the people I love through." Let us remember the grace filled communion. Break the bread, His body broken for me and for you. God is not mocked. Drink the wine His blood spilled out. The great sacrifice ending the great battle being played out in this world. It is finished. It has been won. The Victory is the Lord's. You will be a slave to one or the other. And unlike most slaves you get the ultimate choice who you serve. Life or death. It will be one or the other. We must not blame evil any longer, we must not blame God. We must choose to see. He has Grace. He knew, He knows. He loves.
I plead face down in the carpet of my heart, with fists clenched, for the life of my friend, "Turn to the One who will never turn away from you! 'Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of earth will grow strangely dim. In the light of His glorious face.'"
Revelation 3:19-20 Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent. Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me.
God does not do selection like this world. He does not choose best dressed and coziest home. He does not want the next best talent.
He is looking for open hearts, and honest repenting. He is looking to take the dusty, misunderstood remains of our lives. He brings his sacrifice and love for us as a fertilizer to our ashy soil. Then it happens. A garden of his love, joy, and everything good is harvested in the springtime of our days shared with Him.
Friend, I beg you to choose Him. If you are thinking that this is too good. You are right. God is real and He is good. I know this in my bones. Reality showed itself to me the day I heard the knock and opened the door of my heart. The Father's reality became mine and now I am never alone. Still imperfect yes. But there are blossoms of color and goodness in the garden of my heart where there once was only weeds. And I am thankful.
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Will I Must
Will-ing. After hearing the Word preached today I understand more the greatness of the grace that the Father so lavishly bestows us. With struggling and wrestling I have chaffed against these child bearing, child rearing days. I have fought urges to run and hide. To give carelessly to the wind that load that weighs down heavily day after day. To give up and into the flesh's way of casting responsibility and relinquishing duties. I realize now that it is God's grace that has kept me here. Allowing me to see enough of the goodness in the haystack of chores and children and husband, that I awake another day with purpose of this. The good life that is desperate to finish well.
2 Corinthians 8:12 For if the readiness is there, it is acceptable according to what a person has, not according to what he does not have.
I am ready for more.I am open will, full with desire of a responsibility I have yet to taste.
Matthew 20:6-7 And about the eleventh hour he went out and found others standing. And he said to them, 'Why do you stand here idle all day?' They said to him, 'Because no one has hired us.' He said to them, 'You go into the vineyard too.'
I am thankful that at His appointed time he will allow me a new work that He will fill me for. Whatever may come I can trust that it is His time. He will come to the vineyard of my life and call me to the task. I trust the Father's timing. I trust Him.
1 Samuel 16:7 But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart."
In my battles of mind and spirit I release a toxin of self that is a permeating stench to the people I love. The thing I long to do I do not do! Anger rises up. I will to look. I desire grace. I speak for God to show me. "Long before he drew a woman to a well he drew the well to the woman." I am the woman in need of a drink deep. I see that wellspring of life, but I look away and steamroll with bitterness built up. I long for grace and peace to fill me. But I willed not to go to the well. Is not that what the Father desires most? The will-ing heart? The will-ing self. I must will to see. Then I must will to respond. His promise says that He has laid a way for me to walk in much good. The grace is there for it all to be good. I must bend my will to this grace. Walk low, see the path. Walk high in self and leave frustration unchecked. I am thankful you are teaching me these things. I see you here. In sweet frozen deliciousness and the warm fall wind. I know your here. I am thankful that you are here. Even when I choose not to respond. Forgiveness washes over me. Amazing grace.
2 Corinthians 8:12 For if the readiness is there, it is acceptable according to what a person has, not according to what he does not have.
I am ready for more.I am open will, full with desire of a responsibility I have yet to taste.
Matthew 20:6-7 And about the eleventh hour he went out and found others standing. And he said to them, 'Why do you stand here idle all day?' They said to him, 'Because no one has hired us.' He said to them, 'You go into the vineyard too.'
I am thankful that at His appointed time he will allow me a new work that He will fill me for. Whatever may come I can trust that it is His time. He will come to the vineyard of my life and call me to the task. I trust the Father's timing. I trust Him.
1 Samuel 16:7 But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart."
In my battles of mind and spirit I release a toxin of self that is a permeating stench to the people I love. The thing I long to do I do not do! Anger rises up. I will to look. I desire grace. I speak for God to show me. "Long before he drew a woman to a well he drew the well to the woman." I am the woman in need of a drink deep. I see that wellspring of life, but I look away and steamroll with bitterness built up. I long for grace and peace to fill me. But I willed not to go to the well. Is not that what the Father desires most? The will-ing heart? The will-ing self. I must will to see. Then I must will to respond. His promise says that He has laid a way for me to walk in much good. The grace is there for it all to be good. I must bend my will to this grace. Walk low, see the path. Walk high in self and leave frustration unchecked. I am thankful you are teaching me these things. I see you here. In sweet frozen deliciousness and the warm fall wind. I know your here. I am thankful that you are here. Even when I choose not to respond. Forgiveness washes over me. Amazing grace.
Saturday, November 26, 2011
The Promenade
6"Is not this the fast that I choose:
to loose the bonds of wickedness,
to undo the straps of the yoke,
to let the oppressed go free,
and to break every yoke?
7Is it not to share your bread with the hungry
and bring the homeless poor into your house;
when you see the naked, to cover him,
and not to hide yourself from your own flesh?
8 Then shall your light break forth like the dawn,
and your healing shall spring up speedily;
your righteousness shall go before you;
the glory of the LORD shall be your rear guard.
9Then you shall call, and the LORD will answer;
you shall cry, and he will say, 'Here I am.'
If you take away the yoke from your midst,
the pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness,
10 if you pour yourself out for the hungry
and satisfy the desire of the afflicted,
then shall your light rise in the darkness
and your gloom be as the noonday.
11And the LORD will guide you continually
and satisfy your desire in scorched places
and make your bones strong;
and you shall be like a watered garden,
like a spring of water,
whose waters do not fail.
12 And your ancient ruins shall be rebuilt;
you shall raise up the foundations of many generations;
you shall be called the repairer of the breach,
the restorer of streets to dwell in.
Isaiah 58 6-12
My self is not bent towards God's Ways. I want things to go my own way. Wonder why I am not happy? fulfilled? walking in love? and faithfulness.... It's not going to happen according to my agenda. This here is the Lord's idea of life lived. This life I long to live must be lived His way. The peace. The healing. It is there. That feeling I long for. My Creator's way. If I am going to find all that fills, I must go to the well. I must drink deep of a life called. Reach outside me. Hushing selfish desires and endless consuming passions. I look to love. Will I touch another with the same loving kindness I long for? I smile. He is here. He knows my heart. He wants to use me. He is such a lover. He loves me. He woos me to His goodness with His kindness. With red sky tonight. I look in awe. The evergreen in porch pots. I inhale the scent and savor. The cherub's grin. I Thank God and snuggle her neck. I find blessing in giving blessing. I am thankfulness. I become it.
to loose the bonds of wickedness,
to undo the straps of the yoke,
to let the oppressed go free,
and to break every yoke?
7Is it not to share your bread with the hungry
and bring the homeless poor into your house;
when you see the naked, to cover him,
and not to hide yourself from your own flesh?
8 Then shall your light break forth like the dawn,
and your healing shall spring up speedily;
your righteousness shall go before you;
the glory of the LORD shall be your rear guard.
9Then you shall call, and the LORD will answer;
you shall cry, and he will say, 'Here I am.'
If you take away the yoke from your midst,
the pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness,
10 if you pour yourself out for the hungry
and satisfy the desire of the afflicted,
then shall your light rise in the darkness
and your gloom be as the noonday.
11And the LORD will guide you continually
and satisfy your desire in scorched places
and make your bones strong;
and you shall be like a watered garden,
like a spring of water,
whose waters do not fail.
12 And your ancient ruins shall be rebuilt;
you shall raise up the foundations of many generations;
you shall be called the repairer of the breach,
the restorer of streets to dwell in.
Isaiah 58 6-12
My self is not bent towards God's Ways. I want things to go my own way. Wonder why I am not happy? fulfilled? walking in love? and faithfulness.... It's not going to happen according to my agenda. This here is the Lord's idea of life lived. This life I long to live must be lived His way. The peace. The healing. It is there. That feeling I long for. My Creator's way. If I am going to find all that fills, I must go to the well. I must drink deep of a life called. Reach outside me. Hushing selfish desires and endless consuming passions. I look to love. Will I touch another with the same loving kindness I long for? I smile. He is here. He knows my heart. He wants to use me. He is such a lover. He loves me. He woos me to His goodness with His kindness. With red sky tonight. I look in awe. The evergreen in porch pots. I inhale the scent and savor. The cherub's grin. I Thank God and snuggle her neck. I find blessing in giving blessing. I am thankfulness. I become it.
Friday, November 25, 2011
Guiding Hand
The Father is working His good work. Today I see the fruit of Faithfulness. Not that I have done different, but I have focused on His faithfulness. In return I see my own faithfulness giving way like tsunami wave. Crashing down. Destroying pride, anger, and frustrations of daily rejection and misunderstanding. It is beautiful. In that strange way that natural disaster is awesome in power yet leaves devastation in it's wake. There is destroying. It is as deep and as mighty as the ocean. myself. It is being crucified. It is wonderful.
I am hurt, I love. I am rejected, I give. I am called upon, I serve. I am isolated, I pray. These lessons that I am learning I believe are not for a time. In younger year I would study and take the exam and forget. Not these lessons. They are written on the frame of myself. They erase old experiences that taught me wrong. On scratch markings and scars there are words beyond what I could write today. (Ps. 100:5, Rom 8:37, 2 Thes 2:16, and Rv 1:5) He is jealous God. He desires you and I to trust Him. I learned young that people could not be trusted. They desert you, reject you, use you, and laugh at you until you are wounded and raw. The Father's desire is not to leave one of his precious creation lacking anything. (ps 34:10) He has the awesome power of turning all things for good! It is His will that we walk a road that makes us more and more like Emmanuel. God is with us. How beautiful is that? That He would allow things to happen. Hard things to happen. And in the end I become more like him.
This is what I am seeing. The more I trust Father's faithfulness to work it's good in me, (Rom 8:28) the more I am free in myself to love and live! Here and now in every trial.I can see his blessings in this mist. My life. Yes, there is pain, frustration, unanswered wondering, but I am not alone. He is here and I trust his guiding hand. (ps 139:10)
I am hurt, I love. I am rejected, I give. I am called upon, I serve. I am isolated, I pray. These lessons that I am learning I believe are not for a time. In younger year I would study and take the exam and forget. Not these lessons. They are written on the frame of myself. They erase old experiences that taught me wrong. On scratch markings and scars there are words beyond what I could write today. (Ps. 100:5, Rom 8:37, 2 Thes 2:16, and Rv 1:5) He is jealous God. He desires you and I to trust Him. I learned young that people could not be trusted. They desert you, reject you, use you, and laugh at you until you are wounded and raw. The Father's desire is not to leave one of his precious creation lacking anything. (ps 34:10) He has the awesome power of turning all things for good! It is His will that we walk a road that makes us more and more like Emmanuel. God is with us. How beautiful is that? That He would allow things to happen. Hard things to happen. And in the end I become more like him.
This is what I am seeing. The more I trust Father's faithfulness to work it's good in me, (Rom 8:28) the more I am free in myself to love and live! Here and now in every trial.I can see his blessings in this mist. My life. Yes, there is pain, frustration, unanswered wondering, but I am not alone. He is here and I trust his guiding hand. (ps 139:10)
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Two Pilgrims Apart
Togetherness. Some would bend to pity upon knowing.We gathered today as lovers and their children. A soft sadness of missing extended family and friends. Then I see with my living goggles. Freckled, smiling girl at sink washing delicate heirloom dishes. Man In Waiting laughing with dish towel in hand. Peaked Boy curled up on the couch nearby. Sunshine Daughter skipping around the circle of our gathering spaces. Wee one is asleep in the sunshine for his afternoon nap as we prepare for our Thanksgiving feast. Husband Lover has come home and is carving the large turkey that was to be provisions for the twenty-five people we hoped to have over before time stood still.
Sickness has become our blessing today. It has created for us a vacation from the going and coming that a holiday can bring. I have found such joy and togetherness here with these gifts. Grace fills our home with expectancy as everyone is actively awaiting our time around the table. The lists are hung. Each one full of twenty blessings and the smell is enough to drive our hungry appetites mad. The table is set. The baby awakes. The laughter starts. We snap pictures, we laugh, we toast many blessing and drink down sparkling grape juice.
I look over and Peaked Boy sits holding an antique glass with a great-sailed ship on the side. Is that You, Father? The first Thanksgiving Day would not have happened without a ship. Ship full of pilgrims. Here I am blogging my own sacred pilgrimage. And this Thanksgiving Day, the one I have prepared in my heart for. Weeks and weeks seeking things that show me a bit more of who You are. And here I am now. In the upper room. Breaking bread. Praying.
I feel tears. A thankfulness comes over me I have yet to know. I am filled with the spirit. I understand Jesus pain more. I am in the Upper Room. Jesus is here. There is a union among us. The familiarity is thick, yet I am sensing a new thing. Did Jesus use the upper room to foretell many things? I call out blessings to my children. I speak of the richness they bring. We dream of future feasting together. I have never been so thankful. The Father's grace fills my day once again. Here in our home where plans were canceled. I am thankfulness. The Father knows better. I trust Him and find joy. He makes life out of this mist.
Come now, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit"-yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring, What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, "If the Lord wills, we will do this or that."James 4:13-15
Sickness has become our blessing today. It has created for us a vacation from the going and coming that a holiday can bring. I have found such joy and togetherness here with these gifts. Grace fills our home with expectancy as everyone is actively awaiting our time around the table. The lists are hung. Each one full of twenty blessings and the smell is enough to drive our hungry appetites mad. The table is set. The baby awakes. The laughter starts. We snap pictures, we laugh, we toast many blessing and drink down sparkling grape juice.
I look over and Peaked Boy sits holding an antique glass with a great-sailed ship on the side. Is that You, Father? The first Thanksgiving Day would not have happened without a ship. Ship full of pilgrims. Here I am blogging my own sacred pilgrimage. And this Thanksgiving Day, the one I have prepared in my heart for. Weeks and weeks seeking things that show me a bit more of who You are. And here I am now. In the upper room. Breaking bread. Praying.
I feel tears. A thankfulness comes over me I have yet to know. I am filled with the spirit. I understand Jesus pain more. I am in the Upper Room. Jesus is here. There is a union among us. The familiarity is thick, yet I am sensing a new thing. Did Jesus use the upper room to foretell many things? I call out blessings to my children. I speak of the richness they bring. We dream of future feasting together. I have never been so thankful. The Father's grace fills my day once again. Here in our home where plans were canceled. I am thankfulness. The Father knows better. I trust Him and find joy. He makes life out of this mist.
Come now, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit"-yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring, What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, "If the Lord wills, we will do this or that."James 4:13-15
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Strong Wait
Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord. (Isaiah 40:31)Bread rises as we wait for the smell, done baking. I wait for husband-father to come home. I wait for cherubs loud feet to bring them to the table upon dinner ready. I wait for Father to reveal another something that I miss if I wait not. And I see! That is the purpose of the waiting. It brings the living. You receive what you wait for. The best this life has to offer can come with the longest waits. The waiting brings empowerment to receive.Father has all good things. We walk in them. We walk in the waiting. We live. Rise, feed, school, hug, hurt,love, cry, all encompassing living in waiting. A never done walk of life giving and taking. As I wait I will chose expectancy. The kind of waiting when life will be brought forth from your womb. The waiting that brings new seasons of the heart and the earth. The waiting that says life does not begin when things come. The kind of waiting that purposes life lived now. Truly living, loving, feeling, seeing, hearing, knowing. I am thankful. I wait on the Lord. His strength fills me. I am satisfied in Him.
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Holy Sense
Today again I am challenged with my appreciation of seven senses. The first five: tasting, seeing, hearing, touching, smelling. I also give thanks for the Spirit who gives a knowing and direction beyond these five. For mother sense. Mother sense knows the baby is awake before she does, and mother sense alerts my child is hurt, but they are out of five sense reach.
All in all I am amazed by the gift that these are. Our senses are the starting place. The pivotal need for any pleasure to take place. If the Lord had not given us such blessing there would be no desire of the infant to suckle the breast for nourishment or in the late stages to find peace. We would live in a pot, void, empty.
These musings came tonight upon completeing a short biography of the life of Helen Keller to my children. I enjoyed the children's minds turning. I could see looks on cherub faces as the story unfolded.
I unfolded in the sacrifice of Teacher Annie Sullivan. My, how we underrate the work that no one sees. It was Annie's faithfulness who unlocked Helen from darkness, bitterness, and anger. From a prison called loneliness, misunderstanding. How often Father calls me to be Teacher and I underestimate my duty and my impact. We have all heard, "Enjoy these years they go by too fast." I am afraid they are truth. That surrendering to the things that Father chooses often happens late. We look back and see the joy and sweet fellowship we allowed to pass by. "Holy God, come fresh into our lives. Show us the things we are seeing not, feeling not, tasting not, smelling not, hearing not. Show us the people and purposes we are overlooking."
Helen overcame darkness, isolation, and discouragement. She drove on with intention and will. Teacher leading her daily. Teacher acting as her language bridge. Be it so. Make me a bridge. I set my self to bend to needs and make connection between small child and vast world. I extend myself over scripture to instruct living. I seek holiness to emulate it for senses following. I am Thankfulness for this lifetime of prunning taking place. Being made plentiful for Your glory. I pray my children will be strong healthy olive shoots around our table.
(Psalm 128)
All in all I am amazed by the gift that these are. Our senses are the starting place. The pivotal need for any pleasure to take place. If the Lord had not given us such blessing there would be no desire of the infant to suckle the breast for nourishment or in the late stages to find peace. We would live in a pot, void, empty.
These musings came tonight upon completeing a short biography of the life of Helen Keller to my children. I enjoyed the children's minds turning. I could see looks on cherub faces as the story unfolded.
I unfolded in the sacrifice of Teacher Annie Sullivan. My, how we underrate the work that no one sees. It was Annie's faithfulness who unlocked Helen from darkness, bitterness, and anger. From a prison called loneliness, misunderstanding. How often Father calls me to be Teacher and I underestimate my duty and my impact. We have all heard, "Enjoy these years they go by too fast." I am afraid they are truth. That surrendering to the things that Father chooses often happens late. We look back and see the joy and sweet fellowship we allowed to pass by. "Holy God, come fresh into our lives. Show us the things we are seeing not, feeling not, tasting not, smelling not, hearing not. Show us the people and purposes we are overlooking."
Helen overcame darkness, isolation, and discouragement. She drove on with intention and will. Teacher leading her daily. Teacher acting as her language bridge. Be it so. Make me a bridge. I set my self to bend to needs and make connection between small child and vast world. I extend myself over scripture to instruct living. I seek holiness to emulate it for senses following. I am Thankfulness for this lifetime of prunning taking place. Being made plentiful for Your glory. I pray my children will be strong healthy olive shoots around our table.
(Psalm 128)
"The best and most beautiful things in the world can not be seen or even touched.
They must be felt with the heart."
-Helen Keller
Monday, November 21, 2011
Sustaining Stamina
The thought can completely overtake me. Every night I fall into my most luxurious, white, down topped bed. I proceed to the unconscious for approx 4-8 hours. I suddenly awake. Return to knowing and start my day of sewing and reaping. The part that really tickles me is that everyday my body works. My blood flows, my eyes focus, my legs carry, my arms hold, my senses take in, and on and on, day after day. Who needs a miracle? Who needs a sign? We all know that our flesh is not who we are. We don't pick it and there is a large a bulk of our flesh that most of us would trade right in! My how different we would be if the Creator would have given us a little conference on the matter...I would have spoke up! A little less of this a little bit more of that. But today...reviewing my innermost parts on the screen of ultrasound machine stirred me. So much is going on in me all the time. Conscious or not. Mind would surge and billow if it had to consciously run itself. Can you imagine? Training your heart to pump like you train to ride a bike? No time for blogging.
Then I found His Goodness again. It surprised me once more. He wanted us to have time. He has given us all the time we need to enjoy the expanse of this world he has given us. He could of kept us so assiduously focused running our own flesh that relationship and enjoyment would have been out of the question. Hubots instead of humans.
He chooses relationship. I speculate that this time is to be taken up by relationships. He provides a moment by moment miracle. A breath by breath miracle and we are able to enjoy. (Matthew 6:26) Only man sews and reaps in this world. The Lord takes care of us all. How he longs to meet us where our needs are. Just as he provides for every creature in this great globe, He provides for us. In doing so we can then take glory time. Time to converge with Our Father and the work He is doing to reveal himself to the world He loves. Oh how He loves us. Thankfulness fills me. Who and I that He would call my name. mmmm....that's a Good, Miracle Giving God.
Then I found His Goodness again. It surprised me once more. He wanted us to have time. He has given us all the time we need to enjoy the expanse of this world he has given us. He could of kept us so assiduously focused running our own flesh that relationship and enjoyment would have been out of the question. Hubots instead of humans.
He chooses relationship. I speculate that this time is to be taken up by relationships. He provides a moment by moment miracle. A breath by breath miracle and we are able to enjoy. (Matthew 6:26) Only man sews and reaps in this world. The Lord takes care of us all. How he longs to meet us where our needs are. Just as he provides for every creature in this great globe, He provides for us. In doing so we can then take glory time. Time to converge with Our Father and the work He is doing to reveal himself to the world He loves. Oh how He loves us. Thankfulness fills me. Who and I that He would call my name. mmmm....that's a Good, Miracle Giving God.
Reciprocity
She who is forgiven much loves much.(Luke 7:47) I know that to be true in the openness I find in my dear friend. When the darkness rolls and the storm in my mind rages on. When I plead for peace and can't seem to escape from the turmoil in me. There my friend is. With a compassion and a prayer that transcend frustrations welt up. Where the freedom to feel flows in and stillness in raging is found.
I pour myself out like cider turned. Sweet to the first sip, but leaving that frothy sour after taste. Then it is there. The tender eyes, the half grin. The look that says you will make it through. Then the miracle comes. I believe. I know tomorrow will be a better day. I can see that God is good and he is making all things new. His mercy is new again today. My perspective changes and I can again set my feet on the solid ground. My faith again is restored to sure and steady. I am Thankful for friend. I will love more.
I pour myself out like cider turned. Sweet to the first sip, but leaving that frothy sour after taste. Then it is there. The tender eyes, the half grin. The look that says you will make it through. Then the miracle comes. I believe. I know tomorrow will be a better day. I can see that God is good and he is making all things new. His mercy is new again today. My perspective changes and I can again set my feet on the solid ground. My faith again is restored to sure and steady. I am Thankful for friend. I will love more.
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Living Peace
Peace be still. Peace is still.(Mark 4:39) The Son came and calmed the storm. Oh how good and pleasant these days are where He slows our pace with his loving kindness. Moments where I allow Him to draw me to a slower pace. Peace is in not in a hurry, it is not rushed. It takes the time to keep things important, to share, to enjoy. Peace allows time to breath, to reflect. To allow both the good and the bad the space in life that brings living to the fullest. This slow moving day. Where children's smiles, apples slices cut, toys shared, loved one held, makes the highlights. Where we travel the floors of our home. We take pauses around the peninsula where food and laughter are shared. Where the sandwiches are eaten a little slower and the smiles held a little longer. Where we can bake something sweet and enjoy it at every stage. Mixing up togetherness, baking sweetness, and sharing tenderly the morsels of goodness. Then with the tasting. Life is good this day. Melted chocolate oatmeal peace and kindness and goodness. Here there is Thankfulness.
Friday, November 18, 2011
Open Palm
What a day! I felt it today. The Father's Hands guiding me. You know when one of your children, especially the smaller ones, fall back away from your reach. You are walking ahead as to keep them moving, but you don't want to stop becuase you know if a wee child stops it takes time to get them to go again? You reach back with your outstretched had and you wiggle your fingers and entice them with your open palm and a twinkle in your eye. Most time I find myself doing a little hurry up dance. The children usually do pick up the pace with a silly little grin at parent the playmate. In that moment joy is shared.
Today it was this dance with me and my Great Father. We shared out of pantry, we shared out of our home, and we shared out of our hearts. All the while He was leading me with his loving kindness, his outstretched hand. I keep going over and over in my mind how it is His kindness that leads us to repentance (Romans 4:2) Oh, what a safe place it is to live in the Father's leading. To grow and breath and learn in the shelter of His Love. Like a child who follows along the path of a parent who desires their best. He has prepared many good works that we may walk in them. (Ephesians 2:10)
We pour out so that He can pour in. (Isaiah 58:6-11) I learned to trust more Him today. Giving a bit more. Allowing the All-Knowing, All-Seeing to lead me to go beyond myself. To take a few more steps ahead that I would not have taken otherwise To allow those tender, nail scared hands to draw me ahead. To receive a blessing I never would have know. He is Love, He is Grace, and I become Thankfulness.
Today it was this dance with me and my Great Father. We shared out of pantry, we shared out of our home, and we shared out of our hearts. All the while He was leading me with his loving kindness, his outstretched hand. I keep going over and over in my mind how it is His kindness that leads us to repentance (Romans 4:2) Oh, what a safe place it is to live in the Father's leading. To grow and breath and learn in the shelter of His Love. Like a child who follows along the path of a parent who desires their best. He has prepared many good works that we may walk in them. (Ephesians 2:10)
We pour out so that He can pour in. (Isaiah 58:6-11) I learned to trust more Him today. Giving a bit more. Allowing the All-Knowing, All-Seeing to lead me to go beyond myself. To take a few more steps ahead that I would not have taken otherwise To allow those tender, nail scared hands to draw me ahead. To receive a blessing I never would have know. He is Love, He is Grace, and I become Thankfulness.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Warmth and Chill
This morning I wake up to that pleasant light I found yesterday.
It is at the the most dis-tractable moments when I find these thankfulness-es. I was bending over to put something in the trash and I felt the heat radiating. I said to my child Grins A Lot that the heat from there feels so good. He has the great idea to climb under the nearby settee that I bring in off the porch for the winter and it becomes a meeting place in the kitchen. Under there Grins A Lot acknowledges,"It's warm under here."
As Many Hugs and Justice Keeper file out the door to the coming more orange than yellow children carrier, I set on the frosted deck steps. It's nippy on my toes. I actually smile! It's there in the cold. I am thankful for the chilly fall air.
This is new. Being thankfulness for the warm and the chill. Oh Father, you are here. Teaching me these things. I am blessed I feel full and I feel loved.
It is at the the most dis-tractable moments when I find these thankfulness-es. I was bending over to put something in the trash and I felt the heat radiating. I said to my child Grins A Lot that the heat from there feels so good. He has the great idea to climb under the nearby settee that I bring in off the porch for the winter and it becomes a meeting place in the kitchen. Under there Grins A Lot acknowledges,"It's warm under here."
As Many Hugs and Justice Keeper file out the door to the coming more orange than yellow children carrier, I set on the frosted deck steps. It's nippy on my toes. I actually smile! It's there in the cold. I am thankful for the chilly fall air.
This is new. Being thankfulness for the warm and the chill. Oh Father, you are here. Teaching me these things. I am blessed I feel full and I feel loved.
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Light
It's here. I was starting to doubt it. To be honest with myself, for these last days I thought maybe it wasn't in me. Today I saw it. With sunlight streaming in the big windows it was the faintest glimpse that I almost missed. Something about the light. There was a lamp next to the bed with books and the light...anyway I noticed that it looked good and in my heart's mind I actually said. Thanks. Then in a blink it was gone. I almost missed it. but something in me said WAIT! It is here...and it was Thankfulness!
Tonight again in the bathroom as I approached Mr J, I saw in the dew shaded dampness of the window, the moon. It streamed in as the water on the glass spread the light apart....It was beautiful and I was thankful. I am starting to like this. I am waiting expectantly to how the Creator opens my mind's eye tomorrow to His redeemed world. I am certainly liking this randveu that He is taking me on. Beyond myself, yet I get to enjoy those I love with a new flare.
I have Thankfulness for light!
Tonight again in the bathroom as I approached Mr J, I saw in the dew shaded dampness of the window, the moon. It streamed in as the water on the glass spread the light apart....It was beautiful and I was thankful. I am starting to like this. I am waiting expectantly to how the Creator opens my mind's eye tomorrow to His redeemed world. I am certainly liking this randveu that He is taking me on. Beyond myself, yet I get to enjoy those I love with a new flare.
I have Thankfulness for light!
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Please Thankfulness
I am desiring for Thankfulness to become a new way of life for me. I am not "there" yet by any means. The voice can be heard in my brain though. Isn't that the first step. Setting your mind on the good thing? Thankfulness. Why isn't that in these constant need-filling days I have such a hard time seeing clearly. Not so much with the clearness of vision, but the clearness of heart. to see Thankfulness. To speak Thankfulness. Yes, this seems right and good. I hear the whisper and I want it. Thankfulness. Oh sure... a million complaints come too, but I must focus my mind on what is good. I must Be Thankfulness.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Before
Like any small town country girl it is only fitting that I begin our conversation with the weather. This year has been rough! After giving birth to our fifth child this past September, this winter has been just plain mean. Since Christmas we have had a beautiful Winter wonderland, but now it has turned a bit. My four year old daughter braved the cold yesterday afternoon. After being just too heavy to walk across the top of the snow, the poor dear sunk. Try to keep her balance she hoisted her boot out of the snow to find her cold, snow covered tootsies. Her older brother came to her rescue and carried her to the door before any damage was done to bare, precious little piggies. I pray that she always has a protector come to her aid in times of barren frostiness...Life can be hard sometimes.
Today we were able to have lunch at Mulhiesen's Restaurant. It is a older restaurant-bar establishment in the neighboring town. It was a nice lunch. of course it was. I didn't cook it. As much as I like to cook, food often tastes better when I don't have to be the one washing the dishes. The children enjoy going out to dinner. Brea who is four year old reminded me tonight before bed that she was a very good girl at the restaurant today. I agreed.
Sunday here is very predictable. We help with a student chapel that begins at 11am. Today was a bit tricky because Aaron (my husband) plows snow and wasn't able to be here. He just met us at chapel. I did fix up a roast with the works in case we were to have anyone over, but Aaron's mom sensed that I needed to get out of the house. I was thankful. And dinner is ready for tomorrow. Bonus!!
Today we were able to have lunch at Mulhiesen's Restaurant. It is a older restaurant-bar establishment in the neighboring town. It was a nice lunch. of course it was. I didn't cook it. As much as I like to cook, food often tastes better when I don't have to be the one washing the dishes. The children enjoy going out to dinner. Brea who is four year old reminded me tonight before bed that she was a very good girl at the restaurant today. I agreed.
Sunday here is very predictable. We help with a student chapel that begins at 11am. Today was a bit tricky because Aaron (my husband) plows snow and wasn't able to be here. He just met us at chapel. I did fix up a roast with the works in case we were to have anyone over, but Aaron's mom sensed that I needed to get out of the house. I was thankful. And dinner is ready for tomorrow. Bonus!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)