Personal Prison

Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord,
“He is my refuge and my fortress,

    my God, in whom I trust.”Surely he will save you
from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence. 
Psalm 91: 1-3

I have been bound but now I am free!

I believe that prisons come in all shapes, spaces, sizes, and manifestations. Some can be sickness. Some can be relational, some can be mental attack, some can be just plain rebellion. Some can sneak up on you and close down hard. Some can be bound with painful memories and a wounded heart. Some can come with questions that don't make sense. Keep us from trusting enough to take that one step that would lead us out. Loneliness leaves the cell of our hearts feeling cold and icy. Loss can make the floor we kneel on seem rock hard and jagged. And bitterness...oh how it closes the ears and dulls the light to the way to freedom.

Joseph was in Prison. He was there on a false account. God was with him there. He brought him out of the lowest parts and made him a leader there. I think of how he brought Rahab out to. She was in her prison too. God reached in and saved her before crumbling those walls down. 

I love Him for His timing. He makes all things beautiful in His time. 

The frightening part for me is that even the places that seem the darkest, over time, can feel like home. 

Our Father in His faithfulness to us, thankfully, doesn't allow us to stay there. He reminds us this is not our home. He has gone and prepared a place for us. A place where there will be no darkness, and certainly not prison. Not prison of any shape or form.

In His time, In His time.

He makes all things beautiful in His time

Lord please show me everyday

As your teaching me your way

That you do just what you say

In your time

Thank You Father for sending your son. He set this captive free. Your timing is just right.

Breath Relief

"If you cannot find time to pray,

ask for forgiveness.

Ask to be cleansed of the sin

of having no time to pray...

It could be that Satan is pushing you

into too much work so that you

cannot take time to pray."

-Corrie Ten Boon

Yesterday I found complete depletion. Out of no where my mind spun and my heart sank. I sat and searched and called a friend. In the wise words of a seasoned woman I found my sin. I have not sought God in prayer. I have justified my lack of drawing near to God. I have been actively serving. I am meeting the needs of the kingdom. Then in repentance I sit down and open to Psalm 1. 

Blessed is the man...his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night. 

I have been doing a lot of good things, and I found myself with a list of more things to do. Devastatingly for me, meditating on God's word had not even reached the list. Oh how truly sinful I am. God makes it so simple. How grateful I am he doesn't stockpile my faults and failures like I tend to do to others that I love. I pray that I learn this lesson. Blessed is the day when forgiveness comes to me like breathing. Without thought I sigh out my hurts to the wind. 

Praise the Name of Jesus who has taken away the wrongs of this world. May Your name be proclaimed loudly from my mouth and those of my children's children! Blessings on you today as you read this. Open God's word. Let it bless you!

Heart of Heaven

A letter from a dear friend.

What is your thoughts on Jesus statement that
"The kingdom of heaven is within you" ?

I believe that part of what he is saying is that everything in Heaven can be accessed. The power, the boldness, and the faith. When Jesus left and gave us His Holy Spirit he said that if he didn't leave we wouldn't have the power. The kingdom of heaven was near when Jesus was here. He said that. Then when he left, he sat down at the right hand of the Father to be our great high priest. In His great mercy He sent the Holy Spirit to us, so that His power (the Light) would be in us. The Holy Spirit fills us, leads us, shares Christ's love with us, and guides us. He is one with the Father and Jesus, and because the Spirit lives in us, we are then apart of that oneness. Therefore, even though we have not seen heaven with our eyes, we are a part of it. We are able to be filled by the Spirit and bring that same love and everything good that is in heaven to a world where it is not.

That is why the scripture describes us to be like Jars of clay. Emptying of our sinful selves and being made new into the image of Christ. We are filled with the Holy Spirit. We are Vessels of His mercy and Grace. That is why he doesn't like if when we treat each other poorly or judge one another. We are all made of the same clay and in His image. He is the only one who truly can see the inside of a person and He is the only on who can truly love them enough to judge their hearts.

Sometimes we have to say hard words to one another, because we don't want them to miss out on a blessing in their lives. Those words have to be born out of that heaven love. Bad habits or repeated bad choices are hard for any friend to watch when we know where it is leading. That was what he describes the church to be for. A place of building up and setting right.  Loving tangibly though hard life. Sadly we sin a lot and it gets in the way of Love. That is not His plan. By His Grace though he makes a lot of good out of the messes we get ourselves into and for that I have been thankful many times.

Moral of this story, I know the kingdom of heaven is real. I have it here in my heart!

To Be Or Not To Be

A letter from a dear friend.

I've been reading the bible and I thought I would ask your interpritation of this passage: Luke 14:26 “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple.

This verse had once bothered me a bit, but I do have a sense of what it is saying. The first thing to realize in this scripture is that it is a bad translation. The word hate is not a good translation. A better way to translate would be love less. Which I believe is closer to the Greek meaning of the word.


The title of verses 25-33 is "The Cost of Discipleship." I think taking the whole passage gives it a better meaning as well. What Christ is saying here is that He has to be all. We should look at our lives and what we value most, because he wants us to give it all up for the sake of the call that He has for our lives. Even to the point of dying for Him. Do not forget that He would never ask us to do anything that He has not endured. He sympathizes with all our weaknesses. He is calling for an all or nothing approach to following him, and in doing so at one time or another every relationship we have will be effected by our whole-heart response to His call.

I can see in my own life, after walking through hardships that have left me on the outside of relationships, because of my faith, what he means. He wants us to keep our mind's eye focused on Him. Whoever we love the most...that is who we care about their opinions the most. He wants our focus, so that when others are leading us down a road that is insecure or they are wanting us to get into situations that are not the best, we will look to Christ who understands our deep unmet needs and find the love and strength, that only he can truly offer. We will then follow him into the relationships we wouldn't dare or to the hungry and sick that we wound't have the stomach for. We can then have victory in this world of much defeat. I have done both, and I would not have begged you to read the word and turn to our most Gracious Heavenly Father, if I have not felt his healing, overflowing love spilling on me time and time again in my darkest times. I can't think of a better way to live than completely sold out for my relationship with Him.

No Loanshark

Fill up to pour out. I am feeling poured out too fast. The pouring seems to be coming quicker than the filling. I feel down deep the emptying of this vessel and I grimace. Making the habit of asking daily for Christ himself, our Bread, to fill us. He is the only true bread. The only way. Every day before it even comes to an end, depletion stares me straight in the face. It says "You are running out, running dry."  Of time, of patience, of love.

I focus hard. The Word comes to mind. The hymn fills my thoughts and like a wave crashing on the sand I feel the shift. It's grace.

Oh the rescuer of my soul. The only true compass that holds me steady on the course. The storms cause damage. They do. They sure rock this ship. All those aboard cry out for direction and hope and I look to the the captain and he holds us all steady. Blessed assurance. Jesus belongs to me. I am His. He is mine.


Another wreck diverted. I am so thankful to Him. The keeper of my soul. The Lender of my days.

Wet Grace

Why is it that some days the raw pain takes ransom the feelings of the deep deep love of Jesus? I can see why Mary poured out the perfume, expensive and pure. She could't help but pour silent thanks on the feet of the One who rescued her. From her-self.

I am thankful for today. Twinkling rain, babies forehead's touching mine, warm muffins rising, children laughing uncontrollably, fresh linens on beds....so much grace all around.

 Then I feel the war wrestling in my heart. Of if I had an angel that I could just have at it with! What a release of frustration that must have been for Jacob! In spite of the pain....

I am not giving in. I shout out on the road up the hill. Into the icy rain and darkened sky, "I serve the LORD, God Almighty, the One Who Is and Is Yet To Come! The Great I AM. I will not fear the storm. I know you. My Helper, my strength, will not delay! Steady my Heart!"

It comes. The heaviness settles down. I know He is with me. The release has not come yet. I am buildings walls. I am fortifying the city of my family. I am repairing the breaches. I am fasting, and praying, and fighting with weapons that are not of flesh and blood.

Your faith is only as good as what you put it in. 

My Faith is Strong in Him. He is Truth. He is the Protector and Provider. His love never fails. His Love makes a way where there seems to be none. His peace passes all understanding, His faithfulness stretches to the sky. His Love will endure forever!

He brought me through before. My God will bring me though again.

I am thankful for His grace.

Halcyon Wash

Stinky feet empty out of muddy, snowy boots. Giggles and tilting  bodies pour in the door. My breath comes hard. Frustration building in my chest. Gentleness stops me.

"Aren't your feet dirty too? Am I, I AM, coming down hard on you for the messes you make?"

I am reminded of His loving-kindness again. If God the enormous Creator disciplines me and draws me with loving-kindness, is it right to extend fierce frustration?

no.


I bend low and quietly slip off boots. I whisper questions of the joy shared beyond indoor walls. I think of Jesus taking off his outer clothing, tying a towel around his waste. Washing feet, sopping up muddy water too.


After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him.
He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Lord, are you going to wash my feet?”

Jesus replied, “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.”

“No,” said Peter, “you shall never wash my feet.”

Jesus answered, “Unless I wash you, you have no part with me.”

“Then, Lord,” Simon Peter replied, “not just my feet but my hands and my head as well!”

Jesus answered, “Those who have had a bath need only to wash their feet; their whole body is clean. And you are clean, though not every one of you.” John13 5-10

Is not our feet where we add the preparation of the gospel of peace? 

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand....and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. ...
 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.       Ephesians 6:12-18


I see why it is our feet that have to be continually washed. We cannot come to another with the presentation of them needing something with an attitude that we don't need it anymore. This journey that we make here in the Creation of God does not end until death.


We get our feet washed clean. Then we take the white towel given us and soak up the muddy residue that is left on the feet of one whom we splash the living water on.


This peace as described in the verses is peace with God, which is the foundation for gentleness. Proverbs 16:21 says that a wise heart is discerning and the sweetness of speech increases persuasiveness. We must wash gently. Whispering clearly. Bending down. Reaching Down. Make disciples of those around us headed for darkness and torment.


Father, Let me see my own need for daily repentance and your washing first. That I may take that same need I have that you fill, and be led through that, to sharing Your great love with others. Especially those in my home.

Slow Down to Fill Up

How to explain rest to someone who knows none? Oh how I longed to open my chest cavity and dump out the  grace knowledge that God has so lovingly taught me over the years.  "Well," says visiting friend, "Should I go out and get some work done?"

How many of us seasoned with life's woes long for Sunday afternoon? Where the focus is transferred intentionally from self to other.Where the day brings family into close quarters and screens tuck away to sleeping modes. Laughter fills, children get antsy, games begin, tumbling with daddies are much enjoyed. The difference....the focus.

I was so leery in  my explanation to my friend. My brow wrinkles with legalism and frustration fills me when rules come down hard on unkowing, tender hearts that are seeking truth. As our friend stood there waiting we decided to encourage the same rest today that we enjoy. No self seeking. No money to be made. Just love to be given and rest to be had. We left it up to the open heart and I waited expectantly to see what God was to do. Hours later, under a very relaxed heap of children I heard a joyous explanation of how much was learned from the reading material that will help in the weeks to come!

Love won!  "I'll my best He'll do the rest!" Can you guess where that came from?

He draws us with His loving kindness.....We trust in His ways, He pours out good.


James 1:17 Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.


I love it, Father, how when I point someone in the direction of Your truth, You come take over and speak for Yourself in a way I never could have spoken. You show us- then we give testimony- Your Word multiplies! How Good Are You!!! I Love Your Ways. 

Wipe Away

I must decrease so He can increase. I love John the Baptist's vision of himself. Oh to be so full of The Spirit! Even before birth....I just can't imagine. Carrying an unborn baby that is so full of my Great Father's Spirit that I would recognize the presence of the Lord in my cousin's womb. How awesome is that? I keep thinking how intentional God is.

I wipe away grime on dishes, wipe smears on windows, wipe counters, wipe bottoms, wipe crayons that have gone awry off paper, wipe away food on floors, wipe tears form fallen cherubs, wipe frowns from worried brows, wipe stress from husband's back, wipe mud come in from play...I wipe and I wipe and I wipe.

It's not enough. What I wipe for my family never can be compared to what Christ has wiped away for me. The pit of Hell, the searing after-effects of choices made, the pain of unstoppable hurt that weans but aches, the stab of rejection, the burden of those I love's anxieties, my own fears and unmet needs.

I come to the Father, because of Christ's love. He bore on the cross my everything needing to be wiped away. He not only took the gross, grimy stuff,  He now draws me with His loving kindness to give to him the shame, the blushing, and the cowardice that it all brought. He asks that I pour it out of me into Him, so he can carry it and fill me with the newness of Him. Taking spills and messes and returning it with an array of delicious filling goodness. Oh I am thankful. Enough writing for now. I have some very intentional wiping up to do for someone I love. Too.

Bit By Bit

"If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously without reproach, and it will be given to Him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind."     James 1:5-6

Washing in, washing out. Emotions rise, emotions fall. I sense the surge of my will. Not my will but yours be done, Lord. Wash me and make me white as snow.  I see this battle over sea of life. I crave the peace that stills. I must still to have this peace. I feel the surge of rush. Anxiety overshadowing trust. I hear the call of false duty that shouts in my mind, "hurry!"

Everywhere I look.....stress. Like a wayward vine it overtakes hearts and minds. This world will come to an end. We feel the nearness of it's time. We feel the panic down deep that something must be done. We look to the one who sets the sun. Who moves time. He holds it all. We rejoice. It will as he said. I fall sad over those who will not choose him.

I pray for a harnessed leading today. Like a well trained horse, I lift my head to the one who leads me. I place the bit over my tongue and I look to him for his direction. All day long the spirit tugs here and there. I will go, I will say, I will do. I am filled with joy in sharing labor with my Master. I see the works he has laid out and we walk, trot, work, as one to accomplish much. I am thankful.

Cold Wind

Snow blows vertical. I stand at the sink drinking crisp, cold well water and I think of living water. Flowing so we can take in. Water made to nurture life.

God blows in cold air and all air around me feels cold. Come summer he will blow in warm air and all air around me will be warm.

How is it that we have gone so turned side in our thinking? I have seen this virus in my own life. My way prayed out  equals God responding to me. Then I wonder where the joy is. No peace is to be found in this thinking.

The wind blows cold and I go out in skin covered. The wind blows hot. I go out in skin bare. I respond to it, it does not respond to me. I need the presence of God. I bow down. In the innermost places of myself, bend to trial, hurt, and frustration. I kneel down to receive reconciliation, understanding, and hope. I see God's glorious work. His strong hand bring gifts of His goodness. I raise hands up high. I clap. I dance.

Refiner's fire hits hard. Joy comes. Sickness humbles. Healing rejoices. I see the Father at work. I am thankful.

Call out

And as they were stoning Stephen, he called out, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.”Acts 7:59 (ESV)

Today the phrase "called out" keeps circulating in my mind. Jesus called out for Lazarus to come forth. And here Stephen calls out for his home. 

 

By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go out to a place that he was to receive as an inheritance. And he went out, not knowing where he was going. Hebrews  11:8

Hmm....I am calling out today. In return of Him coming down and rising again I call out. In the midst of misunderstanding, joy, trial, and excitement I call out. You reign! Though I am weak you are strong. Even in this You Are.

 

Faith as big as a mustard seed.

Faith as simple as a child.

Faith that can move mountains.

mmmm.....

One Tocsin

After listening to YouTube link:

Why I Hate Religion, But Love Jesus || Spoken Word 

 I am a tad bit perplexed. Again I refer to The Valley of the Vision and the paradox of the Christian life. Don't get me wrong, I am so grateful when I see young people, especially men, speaking out about faith. This poetic response is raw and bold. I am stirred up to think that people in this present generation are looking for a life resembling pure Jesus. 

Then there is a yellow flag that rises up in my self. Are we not calling the kettle black? Just a tad? When we call these law keepers out? Many well meaning people who do their best to follow Christ, come across as "religious" we might say. We believe them to be demeaning with their judgments and harsh in their accusations. Aren’t their intentions that they lead others toward honest repentance? 

I think of John 2:  

The Passover of the Jews was at hand, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem. In the temple he found those who were selling oxen and sheep and pigeons, and the money-changers sitting there. And making a whip of cords, he drove them all out of the temple, with the sheep and oxen. And he poured out the coins of the money-changers and overturned their tables. And he told those who sold the pigeons, “Take these things away; do not make my Father's house a house of trade.” His disciples remembered that it was written, “Zeal for your house will consume me." 

So the Jews said to him, “What sign do you show us for doing these things?” Jesus answered them, “Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up.” The Jews then said, “It has taken forty-six years to build this temple, and will you raise it up in three days?” But he was speaking about the temple of his body. When therefore he was raised from the dead, his disciples remembered that he had said this, and they believed the Scripture and the word that Jesus had spoken. 

Here Christ responds to the waywardness of the people and the intentions of their hearts. I am sure some of them had pure shock, not knowing the disgrace that their actions were bringing to God's Worship Center.  And some, also not at all surprised, because of the guilt they had felt in the past regarding their actions. 

Zeal to make things right. Was it the Zeal set before him to endure the cross? Is that where frustration was coming from. Knowing he was giving up so much and they were willing to give up so little? Here is where I come to my concern.

Humility is a fine line. In the timeline of our faith, we see Christ for who He is. We are raised up from our ashes of a life. Where there was once cheating, lying, beating down, back stabbing, frustration, self preservation and dissension, we now have grace. We are no longer empowered by self righteousness and false emotions, we have the Holy Spirit with the Sword. The Creator of This Universe's words written plainly for us to hide in our hearts that we may live a life pleasing to Him. And in doing that we start thinking that we know more than this world. That we have a one up on the people that don't know. That those who are being manipulated by evil and don't see the full picture of the death, burial, and resurrection concerning this life and the one to come are somehow the bad guys. So we shout "You should have more grace!" at those we feel judge us. All the while we are blinded. That is not grace. We cheer "Yeah world, take that!" But the people of this world are not the enemy. There is only one of those and he was defeated approx 2000 and 12 years ago. 

I think if we are really going to set out to remove boundaries of religion, we need to stop clumping people. Aren't those who are most wounded hurt other the most? What should we say then? 

Tenth Avenue North wrote it well in their song "Love is here".

"Love is here.
Love is now.
Love is pouring from
His hands, from His brows.
Love is near, it satisfies.
Streams of mercy flowing from His side.
Cuz love is here."

Let's face it. Who wants to be a resounding gong? Let all this world go. Let love reign. Maybe some of us in our desire to bring God glory just use all that He has done for us as a platform to gain something in this world that is not ours. There is only One who can be lifted up. And I am not it. I have been guilty of this. This daily struggle of self-promotion. Using God's grace, His love and mercy, His wisdom and blessing to even further my own ego. I am one breath away-everyday from being a gong. 

May our lives be the temple. Full of Mercy and Grace. I pray Lord today that you raise us up. Make us vessels of your loving kindness.

 

Crafted

He can do all things. All things are possible though Him. He can change people's lives. No man on his own can dramaitcally change his life for good. He can practice will which will lead to change to some degree, but it is only God that can change the heart of a man. Each of us has a fingerprint. A stamp of our originality given to us by the Creator. We are marked all over with the thoughtfulness and intentionality of His will for us to exist. His own heart poured out . We are the finishing touch of His creation.

We grow. We mature. Shaped by environment and knowledge. We see from every growing inch. The world in a different way. And God sees it all. We come in this world with hands clasp tight and we work hard all our days. Toiling, relating, laughing, hurting, worrying, singing, and all for one purpose. To pry our hands open toward God. The Only One. Who in his loving kindness can fill us. Who can pour life changing Truth into our Holy handcrafted shells and bring alive the fruit of His Spirit that we are worthless without.

"To God be the glory, great things he hath done!
So loved he the world that he gave us his Son,
who yielded his life an atonement for sin,
and opened the life-gate that all may go in.

Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, 
let the earth hear his voice!  
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, 
let the people rejoice!
O come to the Father thru Jesus the Son, 
and give him the glory, great things he hath done!

O perfect redemption, the purchase of blood, 
to every believer the promise of God; 
the vilest offender who truly believes, 
that moment from Jesus a pardon receives.

Great things he hath taught us, great things he hath done, 
and great our rejoicing thru Jesus the Son; 
but purer, and higher, and greater will be 
our wonder, our transport, when Jesus we see."

 "To God be the Glory"  by: Fanny J. Crosby 

Continuance

Zacchaeus days. Hours that tick by. Consumed with selfish gain.  Unknowingly my own sin has weighed me down hard. Bent my back and my gaze clings to the floor. Crack of time worn out, wood meeting wood. Hard tile unscathed by shuffling feet. Darkness falls over myself as low lids cover my gaze.

One thought. One word. One name.

Jesus?

Going through the motions. Wash dishes. Dry dishes. Turn to give gold spun, joy child a cup of water. Shadows dance across my face. I flinch. Is that you? He is there with me. I look up. I sense His grin. God of the universe playing light games with me in the kitchen. He laughs at His victory. I attempt to contain my grin. I look out the window. The treetops sway high. Sunbeams shine though and play peekaboo with my gaze. Strong love wind trumps solo view!

He has stolen me again! I am thankful. My heart swells. His promises hold true. Every time. All time. It all belongs to Him alone. I am no longer lonely Zacchaeus stuck down low. I am Child of the King, who bows down low. I look high and get down low. I seek to serve Him who overcomes me.

Miracles are here. He is showing himself True. I invite Him to my table. I break bread with Broken Heart Friend. She finds strengthening to return to continuance. Children need a change of scene and a resting place. They come. We sew. We laugh. We rest. God is here in this place. He is there in your vicinity.

The world holds us down harsh. Christ has overcome the world. He picks up our broken self and sets us high. In the treetops of His love and grace, we rest in the shadow of His wing. In the nest woven by H1is grace, it is a Zacchaeus day. He has brought His grace to my home and has redeemed this day from the pit. I am filled full with thankfulness. My joy in running over.

Not Expendable Now

When in seeing this life clearly we must think low to tread high. Endure dark valley to take in mountain peak. See each small miracle to appreciate the unfolding life journey.

The mothering child coughs and it racks her  hard. Eyes red with tears not shed. Groaning softly for release of stomach clenched. I see the miracle. thankfulness for a cup of water. The expectation of being able to break bread. A gratefulness for daily health that usually goes unnoticed by wee ones playing free.

I am reminded of Christ. I look deep in His revealing days in this world clouded with darkness. Read the story backward. Could He have been sovereign without the storm? Could He have been the healer without the wounds? Could He have set free the captive without the torture?  We could not know grace without the undeserving blood shed tree.

 "Who is he in yonder stall 
 at whose feet the shepherds fall?

 'Tis the Lord, O wondrous story! 
 'Tis the Lord, the King of glory; 
 at his feet we humbly fall, 
 crown him, crown him Lord of all!"

I endure with grace because He did. I love because He loved. I care because He cared. I want to see as He sees.

Fill to pour. Fill to pour. Fill to pour. Where I was once dirt, I become a usable pot. A vessel of His glory.

Pale, ailing child sleeps, and I sneak outside with baby wrapped tight. Smiling boy child is waiting. We roll snow into men. I rejoice. Christ did that for me too. Made me something usable out of something expendable.

Family Bonding

Oh what joy in fellowship.

I believe that relationship is more the glue of this world. Just as there is this strong force that hold even the proton and neutron together, their is an incredibly, understated  force that holds us together. I am not saying that we are going to fall apart, literally. I am saying that we will not be together, healthy, well.

These protons and neutrons that make up all of life are held together by what science calls nuclear binding energy. I think that this energy can be a real hint into a well rounded, Christ-like life. It needs to be bonded with an energy source. Just like our bodies need the whole of all parts working together to function properly, we as the followers of Christ needs that same functioning. And just like our atoms that we are made up of, there is a force that has to be a constant connecting power between us. The Holy Bonding Energy. Aka: Holy Spirit.
I must share too. When one submits itself and allows this undeniable power to come and take over life living, it is unstoppable the effect that it will have on a people group.

I taste this. It is good. I know the wholeness that can come after a true meeting with one another. I know that it is a deep desire we all have to be in a place and know that you belong there. That you were chosen as one of the people meeting in that place.

This is the grace. These longings unfulfilled can be washed and dyed into a cloth of beautiful usefulness. To a tapestry of color with purpose. We have to make the first baby step to the connecting place. We have to enter into the atom where the protons and neurons are connecting and plug into the nucleolus using that great Holy Bonding Energy as our shelter and our guide. We can stand behind a shield of faith knowing that God is not going to lead us to a place of failure. Our most Gracious Heavenly Father does not want us alone. He has designed us for relationships. It is our energy source. He has provided a family for us. And He is the Loving Father actively watching over us all. Working Himself moment by moment into the weave of who we are

Oh how sweet it is when sisters and brothers gather together in unity! Psalm 133:1

For this I am Thankful

The Point

Philippians 2 :1-11

So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.  Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus,who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped,  but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men.  And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

Polyandrium

The realness of our Savior and the nearness of His Spirit brings humble heaviness on my head and heart, crushing cheekbones to the carpet of this deceiving world. I feel the sting of a friend's slow, painful, cancer filled death. I see another.

No care for the sacrificed paid on his behalf. Knowing full well the price Christ paid for his very life and trading it in for every quick fill that leaves emptiness in it's wake.  With a glad heart I rejoice in the vision of my free friend dancing before our Father. The Greatest Lover. I imagine the tears gone and youth restored. She followed the Savior and gave what she had.

With unbearable anguish I cry over my other's stench pond of choices that leaves him floating down a river with a waterfall of reaping that will leave him dead as well. With an angry heart full of frstration at the weaknes of will I will imagine the Father not recognizing Him and I will cry even in heaven for his fate. Unforgiveness, abuse, idolitry, immoralities, the list goes on....was it worth it? Did it give you even a morsel of what it took? It's hurts to imagine.

Please Father make him obey you! But the Father draws us he does not hold us up and demmand we choose Him. He answers the knock, He does not come univited. So I return. Cheek to the carpet. Begging for mercy for the ones I love.

We are choosing to acknowledge Christ as all, but denying the reality of neither giving or submitting to Christ as the keeper of our days. Does this world not see the love? Why do we allow flesh and empty passions rule? What do they offer us that is so good, when the next day we are back to the drawing board. Was a night out that great? Was that new thing you tried that rewarding? Christ allowed himself to be mocked by the Romans soldiers. (Mark 15:16-20) We still mock Him today! It is not enough to acknowledge. He gave all and demands all! Is it not in His right to decide?

Mark 15:16-20 "Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life. And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith."

"I see the mountain so high and jagged.it seems impassible and an unrelenting journey" my lost friend cries silently in their darkness of heart."If God just knew what was in me, what I have done, what others have done to me, what I have put myself, and the people I love through." Let us remember the grace filled communion. Break the bread, His body broken for me and for you. God is not mocked. Drink the wine His blood spilled out. The great sacrifice ending the great battle being played out in this world. It is finished. It has been won. The Victory is the Lord's. You will be a slave to one or the other. And unlike most slaves you get the ultimate choice who you serve. Life or death. It will be one or the other. We must not  blame evil any longer, we must not blame God. We must choose to see. He has Grace. He knew, He knows. He loves.

I plead face down in the carpet of my heart, with fists clenched, for the life of my friend, "Turn to the One who will never turn away from you! 'Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of earth will grow strangely dim. In the light of His glorious face.'"

 Revelation  3:19-20 Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent. Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me. 

God does not do selection like this world. He does not choose best dressed and coziest home. He does not want the next best talent. 

He is looking for open hearts, and honest repenting. He is looking to take the dusty, misunderstood remains of our lives. He brings his sacrifice and love for us as a fertilizer to our ashy soil. Then it happens. A garden of his love, joy, and everything good is harvested in the springtime of our days shared with Him.


Friend, I beg you to choose Him. If you are thinking that this is too good. You are right. God is real and He is good. I know this in my bones. Reality showed itself to me the day I heard the knock and opened the door of my heart. The Father's reality became mine and now I am never alone. Still imperfect yes. But there are blossoms of color and goodness in the garden of my heart where there once was only weeds. And I am thankful.

Will I Must

Will-ing. After hearing the Word preached today I understand more the greatness of the grace that the Father so lavishly bestows us. With struggling and wrestling I have chaffed against these child bearing, child rearing days. I have fought urges to run and hide. To give carelessly to the wind that load that weighs down heavily day after day. To give up and into the flesh's way of casting responsibility and relinquishing duties. I realize now that it is God's grace that has kept me here. Allowing me to see enough of the goodness in the haystack of chores and children and husband, that I awake another day with purpose of this. The good life that is desperate to finish well.

2 Corinthians 8:12 For if the readiness is there, it is acceptable according to what a person has, not according to what he does not have.

I am ready for more.I am open will, full with desire of a responsibility I have yet to taste.

Matthew 20:6-7 And about the eleventh hour he went out and found others standing. And he said to them, 'Why do you stand here idle all day?' They said to him, 'Because no one has hired us.' He said to them, 'You go into the vineyard too.'

I am thankful that at His appointed time he will allow me a new work that He will fill me for. Whatever may come I can trust that it is His time. He will come to the vineyard of my life and call me to the task. I trust the Father's timing. I trust Him.

1 Samuel 16:7 But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart."

In my battles of mind and spirit I release a toxin of self that is a permeating stench to the people I love. The thing I long to do I do not do! Anger rises up. I will to look. I desire grace. I speak for God to show me. "Long before he drew a woman to a well he drew the well to the woman."  I am the woman in need of a drink deep. I see that wellspring of life, but I look away and steamroll with bitterness built up. I long for grace and peace to fill me. But I willed not to go to the well. Is not that what the Father desires most? The will-ing heart? The will-ing self. I must will to see. Then I must will to respond. His promise says that He has laid a way for me to walk in much good. The grace is there for it all to be good. I must bend my will to this grace. Walk low, see the path. Walk high in self and leave frustration unchecked. I am thankful you are teaching me these things. I see you here. In sweet frozen deliciousness and the warm fall wind. I know your here. I am thankful that you are here. Even when I choose not to respond. Forgiveness washes over me. Amazing grace.