It is ringing in my mind a couple of summers ago I was praying. I enjoy the children playing in the grass and the quiet alone moments that summer brings. As I was praying I started to imagine what could happen if we did this and went there. How this or that could shape the children and allow the Lord to use them with that. I got too far down the road and I hear my Shepard's voice..."If you really want to live, turn your imagination over to me."
I stopped in my track of thinking and immediately asked God to take it. that I was offering it. And many time when I dream I stop and invite Him to take over not just my thoughts, but my days.
But then I open my eyes. And reality is so different. Heaven is so beautiful and orderly. People are kind. No one is grabby or greedy. But here....it just seems like nothing ever gets finished. Laundry, bills, errands, cleaning, healthy meals, it creeps up and piles up. It threatens to drown my dreamy self.
And somewhere in this midst of this I wonder...is this my calling?
Could God really have called me to this?
What about that talent?
I want to bring you glory, but this can't be it?
Wasn't this all around me a gift from you?
Can I serve so many people who don't like me?
Did You give me the desires that formed my dreams?
Isn't having a calling making an impact for good?
I haven't made a dent, let alone an impact...
Egypt was training ground. Is this my Egypt? The chosen children grumbled and stumbled. Your promise says I am chosen. Their big egos were sanded down by the desert living and still by Providence there shoes didn't wear out. Mercies are new every morning.
So many stories of people in the scriptures whose dreams wore out, and never in their imaginations did they see the blessing coming on a cloud like it did.
Sarah, Rebekah, Jochabed, Hannah, Bathsheba, and Elizabeth are all women who come to my attention at the moment. Living in expectation. Day after day after day... And then Mary. Our Creator threw her whole family for a loop with His way of doing things.
God's way of doing things tend to repeat in one sense. There is nothing new under the sun. Although it is often timing and details that makes the mysterious, it is the situations that repeat again and again. That of course is why scripture is so delightfully connecting to our daily circumstances. Because although the characters and geography change, it is still the same feelings, similar situation, same sin. same blessing, it's just our turn.
And waiting. Some of the heroins in the bible did such a fine job of preoccupying themselves with life and goodness and responsibility and not wallow in their situation. Others jump the gun and take matters in their own hands. Paying for it plenty. Either way we get to read it in a matter of pages. In our lives things feel a little different.... longer?
The day may come when things change, but most likely waiting came before the day of change.
Waiting. WaitING. WAITING.
Whether good or bad, nothing slows time down more that waiting.
I remember my first pregnancy. The first 30 weeks went so fast, but that last three lasted, what felt like, the previous thirty. And with the children who came later...after knowing what to expect. Those last few nights were dreadfully long. But oh the miraculous blessing in the end.
All of time hangs on this concept. Even the cosmos.
As expectation builds, so does the battle to wait well, and so does time slow and the war wages for Peace to return.
God is with us. Peace is here. All of those things piles still looming and still undone. But I can feel the expectation in my heart. The promised land. Like the Israelites who looked across the river. Freedom on the horizon. It's here, revealing itself in mysteries that only One can unravel yet.
Oh but I trust. I fold and trust. I wash and trust, I sing and trust, I feed and trust.
Joanne Shetler in her book And the Word Came with Power writes in closing something that is churning with transformation of belief in me, "And besides, I've never quite figured out just how to bring God glory. But I have learned to surrender my dreams to Him. And he has made the reality of living according to His plan even better than my greatest dreams."
I stopped in my track of thinking and immediately asked God to take it. that I was offering it. And many time when I dream I stop and invite Him to take over not just my thoughts, but my days.
But then I open my eyes. And reality is so different. Heaven is so beautiful and orderly. People are kind. No one is grabby or greedy. But here....it just seems like nothing ever gets finished. Laundry, bills, errands, cleaning, healthy meals, it creeps up and piles up. It threatens to drown my dreamy self.
And somewhere in this midst of this I wonder...is this my calling?
Could God really have called me to this?
What about that talent?
I want to bring you glory, but this can't be it?
Wasn't this all around me a gift from you?
Can I serve so many people who don't like me?
Did You give me the desires that formed my dreams?
Isn't having a calling making an impact for good?
I haven't made a dent, let alone an impact...
Egypt was training ground. Is this my Egypt? The chosen children grumbled and stumbled. Your promise says I am chosen. Their big egos were sanded down by the desert living and still by Providence there shoes didn't wear out. Mercies are new every morning.
So many stories of people in the scriptures whose dreams wore out, and never in their imaginations did they see the blessing coming on a cloud like it did.
Sarah, Rebekah, Jochabed, Hannah, Bathsheba, and Elizabeth are all women who come to my attention at the moment. Living in expectation. Day after day after day... And then Mary. Our Creator threw her whole family for a loop with His way of doing things.
God's way of doing things tend to repeat in one sense. There is nothing new under the sun. Although it is often timing and details that makes the mysterious, it is the situations that repeat again and again. That of course is why scripture is so delightfully connecting to our daily circumstances. Because although the characters and geography change, it is still the same feelings, similar situation, same sin. same blessing, it's just our turn.
And waiting. Some of the heroins in the bible did such a fine job of preoccupying themselves with life and goodness and responsibility and not wallow in their situation. Others jump the gun and take matters in their own hands. Paying for it plenty. Either way we get to read it in a matter of pages. In our lives things feel a little different.... longer?
The day may come when things change, but most likely waiting came before the day of change.
Waiting. WaitING. WAITING.
Whether good or bad, nothing slows time down more that waiting.
I remember my first pregnancy. The first 30 weeks went so fast, but that last three lasted, what felt like, the previous thirty. And with the children who came later...after knowing what to expect. Those last few nights were dreadfully long. But oh the miraculous blessing in the end.
All of time hangs on this concept. Even the cosmos.
As expectation builds, so does the battle to wait well, and so does time slow and the war wages for Peace to return.
God is with us. Peace is here. All of those things piles still looming and still undone. But I can feel the expectation in my heart. The promised land. Like the Israelites who looked across the river. Freedom on the horizon. It's here, revealing itself in mysteries that only One can unravel yet.
Oh but I trust. I fold and trust. I wash and trust, I sing and trust, I feed and trust.
Joanne Shetler in her book And the Word Came with Power writes in closing something that is churning with transformation of belief in me, "And besides, I've never quite figured out just how to bring God glory. But I have learned to surrender my dreams to Him. And he has made the reality of living according to His plan even better than my greatest dreams."
No comments:
Post a Comment